Another possible reason why your ex won’t tell you why she broke up with you is… 5. If you want to divorce, I also don’t recommend you get the gory details. Doing so will likely make her even more angry at you. I know when he's upset. You suffer the emotional contagion arising from this and feel our pain as your own and with any pain you want to make it stop. I would want her to comfort me. Soooo I decided to just act normal. If she needs to put gas in her car, do it for her. Take it off their already crowded plate. And she won’t tell you. “She won't tell me what's wrong, but she's been crying for hours and she can't catch a breath,” said Lisa, the mom of one of my adolescent clients. You expect honesty in all dealings and especially from those close to you. You are a problem solver and you need to fix the problem … If you are not sure what you have done wrong, you may want to start the conversation by asking her directly why she is upset at you. Girlfriend won’t tell me what’s wrong. But part of the reason I shut down is because people would often minimize what I was upset or anxious about, which just made me mad at myself for being upset or anxious about it in the first place. Or maybe she’s still praying one day you’ll wake up and realize you love her too. For me, it turned out that she found out a guy was going to go inside a church when she was there and kill a bunch of people, but he couldn't do it and talked to the pastor and threw away his weapons. I haven't replied yet. He shows it VERY well. I also told her I won't pressure her to talk and that she can talk when she is ready. So, here’s my advice: talk to him and ask him if he’s willing to see a therapist. She loves you enough to not say it because maybe she’s still holding onto a little bit of hope. Recently, she's fine in person, but while texting she's slow to respond and doesn't say much, but what she does say always seems like she's in a bad mood. I did tell her that I wish I knew what it was so that I could make things right, but told her I wouldn't pressure her. She will hope she is able to send you signals by acting in a way that just makes you feel like dirt, and that will make you just leave. He is frightened of your reaction. It's making me mad and I have no understanding of the why. A lot of times when we talk or hang out, one minute he's happy and joking around with me, and the next minute he's angry or annoyed or upset, and he will never tell me why. I ask him if he's going to tell me at lunch, or later, and he always replies that he won't or "probably not" and then smiles. While there were some rather unpleasant responses (like the guy who called me a pussy for being upset or the woman who messaged me to say that if I couldn’t satisfy my girlfriend I should let better men do so because she deserved it) the overwhelming majority were kind and sympathetic. If she's upset in class and can't focus, take some notes for her. I even sent mean texts. “It could be something as simple as you’ve forgotten to feed them,” Olshavsky says. But when I ask him what's wrong or why he is upset, he won't tell me. That's where you come in. Because women do not like to intentionally inflict pain if the person she no longer cares about did things and still does for her kids. If this is the case, just tell her that you care and let her cry it out. I say I care to much to believe that he's fine, but he just smiles, and hugs me. By showing this same compassion towards my own son, I'm starting to let go of that judgement I have towards myself that I'm too sensitive. She seems mad at me and won’t talk to me at all. My girlfriend [18F] won't tell me [17M] why she's upset. A ROYAL author and close friend of Princess Diana claims Prince Harry is "barely recognisable” and that Meghan Markle “always planned to leave the … She’ll act like she’s just tired or out of it. I just thought it was stupid that she wouldn't tell me why she was mad. Your friend may be so upset that he or she isn't looking out for his or her health or comfort. Keep calm as crying or getting angry with make her clam up. I honestly didn't make it about me. 01-13-2021, 10:12 AM ManApplet : Location: Wisco Disco. Obviously, you shouldn't let her take advantage of you. So that's a little extreme but she wouldn't tell me why she was upset for a long time. Alcohol is never the solution if a friend is upset-- it is literally classified as a depressant. 4. About something I did? If you want to reconcile I recommend you do not get the gory details. Acknowledge your faults – if you are really somebody who is likely to retaliate – but explain why you’ve decided this wouldn’t be a good idea (ie: it will let even more people into the secret and just make everything worse). She's annoyed with me and won't tell me why - Said not to worry about it (date, woman) User Name: Remember Me: Password Please ... and that I did not mean to annoy her or upset her in any way. I (23m) and my (20f) girlfriend have been dating for about 2 years now. That’s the similar thing that happened to me, I was talking with this girl for three months and she would tell me that she loved me and we would talk daily, and I asked her out on the third month and she said she wasn’t ready so I gave her time. I fell asleep thinking about everything last night, and this morning has been crazy at work. Why she’s upset may be more of a mystery. 01/06/2016 12:32 pm ET Updated Jan 06, 2017 Young couple having relationship difficulties, outdoor shot One of the most frequently-voiced complaints that we hear from our clients and students (and admittedly, it usually tends to be women who we are hearing it from) is "He won't talk to me." She set me free from a horrible sin, and reached into my soul, pulling out the very best in me. To fix this, try giving her a snack. There are a variety of reasons why your husband won’t open up – beyond thinking you won’t find out the details of his affair. If she doesn’t want to tell you, don’t pressure her. Hmm this happened to me too. You expect us to be honest and tell you what is annoying us. She becomes very quiet and cut off from everyone. Secretly, she may be hoping that her barely-there feelings for him will grow over time. Apologize and make amends. Also, she left you so she feels it is none of your business and will probably not tell you if she is seeing someone or not. I want her back. Either she hides it altogether or she slants what she says in hopes that will somehow reduce the negative effect it will have on you. When our arguments were “resolved,” the resolution was usually that I had to work on myself because I was overreacting or my expectations were unreasonable. One thing that has been consistent for the time we have been together is that when something upsets her she turns into a totally different person. I love her. And that seemed to annoy her. She's annoyed with me and won't tell me why - Said not to worry about it User Name: Remember Me: Password ... As a matter of fact she just texted me: "Hey, I promise I haven't been ignoring you. He probably thinks you will get upset, cry and get angry and he tells himself: ‘It’s over now, so why put her (and myself) through the aggravation. Most people dont like that pressure so if you want a chance of knowing then back off and let the situation mellow out for a while then try to ask again. She’s afraid to tell you the truth in case it makes you angry. Now I'm upset, this woman can't speak sentences. So now I'm stuck trying to figure what to do because she doesn't want to tell me and she's ignoring me. Don't Give Up When He (Or She) Won't Open Up. But as days past I felt her distancing away. He’d tell me what the right angle was, and I’d feel guilty for not seeing things that way in the first place. The next day, she posts about not moving on from her ex and that she commit to anyone. The person you love is upset, angry or tormented and this pains you. But that’s exactly why she won’t. Is she still is reticent, share some of your guesses why she could be holding out. She won’t respond to nice texts, where I tell her how nice she is, how I want to support her, live near her mom, etc. I couldn’t respond to most because there were so many but I assure you, you are appreciated. Relationships. She might just need some space. Or she knows its going to devastate him and cannot bear being “The mean one”. So for the past few days my girlfriend has been a little on edge and seems a little distant. Me (15) and my boyfriend (18) have been going out for 7 months. You may say, “I'm aware you're upset at me, but I'm not sure why. I told her "I understand. asking her questions and contacting her all the time will only push her farther away! I acted like it didn't phase me... and it almost didn't, after a while. Doesn't try to hide it. Some girls don’t like to talk about why they’re so upset. I don't even know. Yeahhh and she ignored me for the whole day. She's annoyed with me and won't tell me why - Said not to worry about it (dates, wife) User Name: Remember Me: Password : Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! It won't take long to put an extra effort into your relationship and it will help her feel less overwhelmed. Maybe some would argue if she loved you enough she’d take the chance. I broke up with her, twice, and don’t know how to get her to respond to me. Can you tell me why?” Don't ask her this if you have any suspicion as to why she may be upset. Making someone feel oversensitive and unreasonable is gaslighting. I miss her. However, if I did something wrong I wish she would tell me, so I can have some form of closure. I'll be here for whenever you want to chat" with her final reply being "ok". "I can't get him to open up. She responds to the mean texts only, defending herself. As both a couples counselor and a therapist who treats primarily women, I totally understand what you are going through. Do not think that your friend will feel better if you open a bottle of wine or bring over a six pack. I hope you're OK and I hope you're having a good day. " I cannot be mad at her, because she did something for me that I don’t think even she will understand. I'd want her to tell me it's Ok that I'm upset and not judge me. Apparently her vocabulary has been minimized to "Ok" and "No". When she’s upset, she doesn’t spill her feelings unless someone asks her how she’s doing. I left her a few voicemails, no call back from her. 4. K so my friend came to school this morning... upset. 1. Some forums can only be seen by registered members. I have worked with cheating husbands and cheating wives. Sometimes, a woman will get into a relationship with a man that she’s not fully attracted to, simply because he’s a good man. Maybe she isn’t ready to be met with rejection and silence. The second kind of liar is what I call the “protective liar.” That means that when she feels that the truth will hurt you, she won’t tell you the truth. Some girls don’t like to talk about why they’re so upset. And most of the time, even if someone does ask her what’s wrong, she won’t say a word. She’s the type of girl that claims she’s fine even though she’s dying inside. Well, tonight I got a little snippy with him when he started doing it because he always does it. I gave her space, and when she said she was still upset, I asked if there was anything I could do to help.
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